Voice Over And Narration Services By Matuschka Lindo
by Matuschka Lindo

Never have, never will like Halloween. I don't like to be scared, I don't like to even think of witchcraft or evil, and I don't like to get dressed up in costumes. So, there should be no surprise that Halloween is one of my least favorite holidays. I can still smell that plastic mask I use to wear on my face as the rubber band tangled with my curly hair and my tongue would have small cuts since I used to stick it through the mouth slit of that damn mask. Oh... the memories are so awful. Even now I think I have carpel tunnel in my wrist from having to change the channel on the remote so quickly because while surfing what's on television, there is always some creepy or scary movie airing this time of year. To this day when I see those arms flailing and reaching through the window in the black and white classic of 'Night of The Living Dead' my skin crawls. Then I have some friends that love to fill bowls full of candy because they want to stay home and give out candy. They are so excited to see all the different costumes and hear the jokes from trick-or-treaters. I must be the Grinch of Halloween, because that sounds like bloody hell! Now let's talk costumes and dressing  up... Have you seen the halloween costumes for women. Where was I when Halloween became expose your breast day. Every costume for women is so scantily clad and boobalicious or skin tight. Ahhh no thank you. I don't want to be a Bar Wench, A Vixen Gypsy, A Burlesque Babe, or a Playful Bunny. It's tempting though isn't it? Hardly, enough! I am almost 50 years old this blog is going to be about what the hell we can do to enjoy October 31st if you are a Halloween hater like me. At least let me direct you to a website with some empowering costumes for women if you do love getting all dressed up.

#1 Choice for non Halloween lovers, start getting ready for the real holidays to make the next couple of weeks less hectic. Great night to plan how you want to do your turkey. Fry, Bake, Smoke or Order from somewhere. Start planning that meal and what you are going to do for Turkey Day. Here are 101 Thanksgiving recipes along with ideas, many are real simple. Get that Christmas card ordered and behind you, you can get 60% off some Christmas Cards on Optimal Print website through October 31. You can also do what I did last year...  I shopped. The stores are empty, the money you didn't spend on a costume is now in your pocket for some holiday outfits. SCORE! Lastly, this is one of my favorites. Go to the store on Halloween day and buy your favorite halloween candy at a bargain sale price and make the most delicious recipes from HERE! Great desserts made with leftover halloween candy! YUMMY!

As I conclude my All Hallows' Eve Humbug I must let you know it is one of the worlds oldest holidays. There is some pretty interesting history to the day even if you don't like the trick or treat festivities. While October 31st is my least favorite day there is a positive side... anyone that has ever read a blog of mine knows that this time of year is my favorite season. Halloween is the kick off of fall favorites. Football, pumpkin flavored everything, piles of leaves and the start of throwing logs into fireplaces. It's BIG yummy sweaters with sweats and fuzzy socks. It's crisp air, comfy boots, winter wardrobes, and mugs of soup. A toast to Fall my friends... Salute!

Keep looking forward so you don't miss what God puts in front of ya!

Matuschka's Midlife... Telling it like it is...
Above picture by laura maxwell facebook page

by Matuschka Lindo

Don't worry it's happening to me too and unless you are one of the lucky few, and I mean FEW, it's going to get worse as we get older. No, I'm not talking menstrual cramps good Lord, you should almost be done with those by now. I am talking leg cramps and foot cramps. I'm talking you look at your foot and the cramp is so incredibly bad it doesn't even look like your foot when you are looking down. It's almost in a deformed state the cramp is quite frankly... excruciating! So much so that your toes are curling up. You can't even straighten your foot or your toes. Same as the leg cramp. We all use to get them especially if you were involved in any type of sport, when younger those things were called Charley Horses. Well you are dreaming for one of those now because a Charley Horse is nothing compared to the vicious pain that has knotted your 40 something plus muscles into a vice grip from hell. Leg cramps become more common the older you get. You will begin to notice the closer you get to your 50's, by the age of 60 many individuals can expect to get them once a week. By the age of 80 over half of us will have leg cramps as much as three times a week. Regardless of the age these cramps will spasm in your feet, to your calf, thigh and leg. Leg cramps need to be addressed as you get older. The range of pain as well as the length of time the cramp lasts can all vary.

I don't think there is a good location or time of day to get one, because I of course have had them at all the worst times. The scariest and where I get them the most is driving. Not sure if it's because I'm short and I no longer have my Denali where the foot pedals moved up with the touch of a button. Unfortunately now in my convertible VW without moving foot pedals. I have to stretch to reach the pedals dammit. But I can be on the highway and BAM my foot starts contorting and the pain is so unbearable I have to pull off the side of the road. I literally am driving and the car is jerking as I am trying to stop with my left foot because yes that cramp is for some reason always in my right foot. Oh Philly Fusz how I miss my Denali foot pedals! The night cramps aren't much better.  I need my sleep too and I absolutely hate when I am sleeping like a baby and I get that wrenching pain where my eyes fly open, I stare at the ceiling and then I jump out of bed trying to walk it off as my calf is balled up, as if I were wearing 5 inch heels. With 50 knocking at my door these cramps are already taking their toll. I can't seem to find any quick relief or figure out how to get rid of them. What in the hell are causing these cramps as we age? It's a fact as we age nerves control muscles and nerves wear out and the muscle deteriorates. It's just happening folks.

So, a couple of things... Leaping out of bed as we age is ahhh... not good. As I said with our feet and toes twisting into these unimaginable forms as the cramps get more extreme we can actually break something now like a toe or an ankle. We will have to be patient and figure out ways to relieve the cramps, as well as to try to prevent them from coming so frequently. Losing that good night's sleep with cramps coming more frequently can also be harmful to our health... there are a lot of things to consider here. Stretching and flexing our muscles is going to be key as we age probably even more than vigorous exercise. We do not want to eventually be stuck in bed without flexibility and mobility and lie there in excruciating pain. Dear God keep moving as you age, you must keep moving. But you also must get it checked if it gets too painful because there may be more too it. Call that neurologist and get it checked out. Remember as in ALL things as we age sooner is better than later. There are treatments, exercises, therapy, vitamins like calcium and iron but you won't know what you need unless you go get it examined. I'm almost at that place. If you see me pulled over on the side of the road cursing and pushing away from the steering wheel with both arms extended as I am slamming the floor board. Don't panic I just have another cramp in my foot!

Keep looking forward so you don't miss what God puts in front of ya!

Matuschka's Midlife... Telling it like it is...
Above picture by www.webnat.com

by Matuschka Lindo

For me to check out the latest foreign film at the Landmark Theatre in St. Louis and see what's playing on a night when all family members are booked is quite the treat. I have never had a hard time going out by myself. I find it very relaxing and it's a guaranteed wonderful time where I get to choose the movie that I want, or the restaurant that I want to dine in, as I said quite the treat. On the Today Show on NBC they just did a story called Table For One, The Rise of Solo Dining. Recent polls show that going out solo is on the rise and becoming more and more acceptable. According to Open table, reservations for dining alone are up 62 percent. Recently I have started traveling more and room service isn't really appealing to me. I like to go to a nice restaurant and get something healthy but fused with what is popular in that city. Let's not forget a nice glass of wine or a native brewed beer depending on where I am. Even when I was younger and traveled I never had a problem eating out when I was in a city where no one knew me. It was a little harder in the town I was living in... why I felt like that in my 20's and 30's I have no idea. But I can tell you right now I could park a table in the middle of the street in down town St. Louis and eat dinner by myself and not give a rats ass of what anybody thinks. I love dining alone and enjoying every single bite!

For some reason in the past there was a stigma to eating alone. I know I use to feel like people were looking at me and thinking oh poor thing she couldn't find anyone to eat with her. I know it wasn't just in my mind the thought is reflected in movie clips and sitcoms. Society's mind set on dining alone is changing but so is my midlife mind set. When I am out alone or I see a midlife woman out alone I am thinking, lucky lady she is enjoying an evening to herself. Or i think, oh thank God I escaped and found some alone time. Funny how your mind set changes everything. EEnmaal is the first one person restaurant where tables are set for singles only. BBC news has a great article that made me laugh out loud reflecting on the stigma to eating alone goes all the way back to our childhood and the school cafeteria. Stating that basically that was social suicide. Of course they are right! I am sure even today my children would not be caught dead eating alone in their school cafeteria. At midlife I relish the silence, the entire dining experience, I appreciate what I am eating it's not just to fill my hunger. I am sure in big bustling cities like New York City it's very common to eat alone especially during a non meal occasion when you are just grabbing something on the go. Even breakfast and lunch are easier to do alone. But dinner can still be a challenge to do alone, especially when we are talking about fine dining. Honestly, when I go out alone it is most definitely to treat myself, so it is usually fine dining. A recent study shows Dallas, Miami, and Denver are the top three cities with the greatest growth in dinner reservations for one.

Other social events that cause people to raise their brows is going to a wedding, concert, or a movie alone. Again 20 years ago Ahhh NO. Now, no problem just a delight for me and many of my friends at mid-life. My absolute favorite day to go to a movie is a rainy or snowy day when you really don't even want to get out of bed. I usually try to find a theatre that sell's wine if I'm going to be truthful. If you haven't tried a nice cabernet with movie theatre buttered popcorn you are missing out. I get on line and try to find an afternoon special and quickly by the ticket. Sometimes I sneak out of the house at 2:00pm other times I wait until 8:00pm after dinner and settle for a cab and milk duds if I'm too full for popcorn. The full body of the cab with the sweet milk dud... another must try! Either way I get to pick the movie, my seat, and I get to slouch down and hide in solitude. Seriously does that not sound AWESOME? Here are 13 Reasons You Should See Movies by Yourself More Often! Really the fear of going out alone, I think has more to do with worrying about what people will think of you and at midlife... We Don't Care! We just don't. I think that is why it's easier to just do what you want to do. I think it's healthy to enjoy yourself as you get older and explore new interests  that may be developing. Start small, I'm not saying to go solo to a movie on a Friday date night, or to go to the most popular restaurant on a Saturday night. Just don't deny yourself when you find yourself alone and you are really in the mood to do something. Go Do It!

Keep looking forward so you don't miss what God puts in front of ya!

Matuschka's Midlife... Telling it like it is...
Above Picture by www.naplesnews.com

by Matuschka Lindo

This happens once a year, maybe twice. There was absolutely nothing on my calendar on a beautiful fall Saturday. And with our crazy schedules it just so happened that my entire family was also out of town. This, my dear readers is an act of God at the Briggs House. All of you midlife women/men with full time jobs, (in or out of the house… this includes homemakers) an active family, philanthropic obligations and just the craziness of life know that a free Saturday is a gift. Friday night I went solo to a party, then came home early to plan out my free day. I was in bed with my jammies by 10:00pm. I had my glass of wine (yes it was the third for the evening, it’s Friday) and started creating my To Do wish list for Saturday.

 Matuschka’s To Do List:

1.     Take a long shower with new scrub purchased 3 months ago and haven’t used.

2.     Walk the dog on a new path where the leaves are already turning.

3.     Go to a new coffee shop with my laptop and enjoy a big mug of coffee.

4.     Call my beautiful Niece Sophia for her Birthday!

5.     Change out my pots to fall mums and clip back hostas.

6.     Schedule a massage for late afternoon after gardening.

7.     Run by Nordstrom’s for triple points and look for winter coat.

8.     Go to an artsy movie with subtitles. (My family would never do this with me.)

9.     Finish off the night with carry out Chinese and a glass of wine in bed.

It’s like a dream list isn’t it. I mean this is going to be the best damn day ever. No one to change my plans, no one else to answer too, I mean I am home free! So excited! I can’t even type this blog out fast enough. I want this day to be so perfect because who knows when this will happen again. Okay let me share my Fabulous Fall day with you…

Matuschka’s Lazy Fall Saturday October 3, 2015.

1.     Wake up clock says 7:30am. Oh I have all day, I’m going to sleep some more.

2.     Feel dog staring at me. Wake up. Hmmm it’s 9:35am, bet she has to go potty real bad. Throw on robe and slippers and just walk dog up and down sidewalk about three houses and back. I’ll do the fun walk later to look at leaves.

3.     Get back in bed. Turn on TV and see that Footloose is on with Kevin Bacon. Grab a protein shake and decide to watch,  just until my favorite part… his big dance seen in the barn.

4.     Damn it’s 12:00pm already. I need to take a shower. Haven’t really followed my list. No stress, I have all day and night. Kinda hungry, driving to new coffee shop sounds like a lot of work. Half bitten oatmeal cookie that someone left on the cookie tray looks good and hot tea sounds nice. Yummy, back in bed I go.

5.     Just going to rest my eyes for a sec.

6.     Wowza it’s 2:00pm. Let me call for a massage. Damn they are all booked. Go figure? Didn’t’ want one anyway. Let me get my phone and reach out to the family who are all with friends in Denver. Got my phone… Get back in bed and face time. No answer! Hmmm wonder what they are doing… not really but it sounds good to write that down. LOL

7.     Shoot let me call my niece Sophia for her Birthday, trying to stick to my to do list. At least somewhat right? Sophia is so cute she tells me she got a lot of thingy ma bobs for her nails. 

8.    Wait... what time is it? Damn it’s 4:00pm, I should really get out of my jammies and take a shower. But I’m so tired. Besides I tell my self I don’t have to stick to my schedule it’s MY day. Back in Bed… But I need a coat. Jump out of bed to grab lap top. Got it! Back in bed to surf around on Nordstrom’s website. Hate doing this now I’ll see every coat I looked at on every damn social website feed. Buy a coat! Another list accomplishment done.

9.     Wow it’s almost 6:00pm and I haven’t done much… Too cold and getting dark to do gardening. Maybe I should jump in the shower then order Chinese? Let me try my family again first.

10.    They can’t talk they are eating a late lunch with our friends the Palettas. I’ll call back in a sec. Let me just lie down and look at the Chinese menu on my iPad. Oh there’s a pop up message from late yesterday saying I have all my lives on Candy Crush. I’ll do a level or two real quick in bed.

11.    Holy Crap it’s 9:00pm. I dozed off after Candy Crush. Shoot! Look at my phone no one called not even my family. Whatever… I’m hungry! Order Chinese… go get glass of wine and turn lights on in the house. It got so dark so quickly. I really should take a shower while I am waiting for the Chinese.

12.     Dog is staring at me. Oh ya, you need to go out again, and you need food and darn you have no water. Sorry… been a little busy!

13.     Finished wine, only ate half of Chinese. Too tired to shower besides it’s 10:53pm. What happened to the day? I look at my To Do List. Total fail!

In conclusion, I must say the fact that I stayed in my jammies all day and did whatever the hell I wanted to do made it a great day. Yet another list that didn’t get completed, but does that matter? As I look back on my Lazy Fall Saturday and re-evaluate the gift of a free day. There really should not even be a list. It should be a day that unfolds unplanned. In the end I say to all of you midlife over committed compadres….  Don’t plan your free days. Just let them be! Lord I don’t even think I brushed my teeth or combed my hair. Nasty… But Ohhhh so marvelous!

Keep looking forward so you don't miss what God puts in front of ya!

Matuschka's Midlife... Telling it like it is...
Above image from 8tracks.com