by Matuschka Lindo
Many of you know that Nordstrom is my absolute favorite shoe store. I have been to the Flagship store in Seattle and a plethora of others throughout the United States. A few weeks ago I ripped the strap on one of my favorite black sandals. Finding a good comfy black sandal is not easy. Recently, I was driving by the mall in sweats and tennis shoes. I made a last minute decision to go sandal shopping
. I only found two black sandals that I really loved and knew would be comfortable by the brand names. I had to take off my socks to try them on. It was still March so I had not gotten the much needed pedicure. The salesperson was a nice guy, yet half way through the sale when I am walking by the mirror he says, "I'll be right back." He returns from the cosmetic counter with a sample moisturizer and recommends them for my feet! Son of a bitch how embarrassing! I am back pedaling trying to explain that this was not a planned stopped and I was not prepared and my feet aren't usually this dry…. blah blah blah. He is giving me the "Mam just take the moisturizer sample and put some on for when I return." I am mortified. I will tell you how this shoe sale ends shortly.
As spring comes the boots hit the closet and its time to take out the sandals and the flip flops. This used to be a no thought process. Grab a pedicure, get some new sandals, and 'BAM' you are ready for spring and summer. Not so easy anymore… I look down at my feet and my heels and I think ashy is an understatement. My feet are black so ashy is a frightening sight! I remember when I was little looking at older women with heels that were all cracked
and thinking eeewwww why don't they put lotion on those or get a pedicure. As I pitter patter into midlife, I am finding that it's more than just the lack of attention you give your feet. Dr. Mehmet Oz says there are fewer oil glands on your feet, so they are much more likely to become dry. As you get older, natural exfoliation and production of new skin cells occur at a slower rate, which can make it more difficult for your dry skin to heal. But that does not mean neglect your feet. It means we need to start working on them earlier! It also means we need to put much more effort into making them pleasing to the eye. Because I am sorry I don't care how cute or expensive your sandals or flip flops are... dry cracked feet/heels Do Not Go Unnoticed. Your feet say a lot about you, including your health condition.
Back to the Nordstrom Shoe Salon. Another sales person has heard all my excuses for why my feet were not prepared for this sandal shopping stop. She comes over and sees me rubbing on the sample moisturizer. Now this nice sales girl makes me feel worse while at the same time gives me great advice. She states that her mom never had dry feet or cracked heels until she got older. I was thinking thanks for putting me in that category. (Just for the record I don't feel old. I don't think I look old, and I think old is a state of mind formed by the myth that when you turn 50 you are old. I digress this is another blog coming soon!) So the sales girl calls her mom on the phone in front of me and writes down some ingredients. She then hands me a homemade concoction for dry feet. She says it's inexpensive and that she promises my feet will look better than any pedicure in 2-3 weeks. Fast forward to this week. I have just gotten all the ingredients and put it all in a jar. So to wrap up this blog... I purchased some cute comfy black sandals. Received a great sample moisturizer and the secret balm for a possible miracle foot cream. All in all a successful shoe shopping experience. ONLY at Nordstroms!
P.S. I will let you know if the Secret Balm Works. Enjoy and tell me if you like it!Secret Moisturizing Balm:
15oz Baby Lotion
Tub of Vitamin E Cream (Dollar Store)
Large Jar of Vaseline
tsp. of GlycerinKeep looking forward so you don't miss what God puts in front of ya!Matuschka's Midlife... Telling it like it is...
by Matuschka Lindo
I am a people person. I love large crowds, I love meeting new people and new experiences. Of course it must all be to my choosing, especially as I get set in my ways. So, all is good as long as things are in my comfort zone
. I am finding that when I am forced out of that comfort zone; do to whatever circumstances, it bugs the crap out of me. Especially now at midlife when unexpected changes seem to be coming in droves! I see it happening to many people my age. Some may be major like a move, a new job, going back to school. Others may be minor, but it still brings a sense of dread and fear. Maybe fear is a strong word for the minor changes. More like unease and discomfort, which lets face it, at this stage of our life is not appealing. We are now always looking for constant peace. This is the beginning of our second life and we want it stress free! Is that too much to ask for? YES! (Test your Comfort Zone HERE
My comfort zone score was 67.7 out of 100! This quiz is cool, quick, and easy with great advice to make changes!)
A few weeks ago I was put into a situation that I knew would either be very uncomfortable or pleasantly palatable. My daughter had a dance performance/convention in Chicago and several moms from the studio were driving up. I reached out to the one I was willing to be in a car with for 4.5 hours, but her car was already full. She stated that another mom was going alone and I could ride with her and we would caravan. Now I knew this mom for years and adored her girls but I didn't know her… you know? Really know her.
I'm pretty picky when it comes to confining myself into a small space with someone for several hours. An acquaintance was not high on my list. I thought to myself Matuschka quit being so stuck in your ways and a closed off bitch. Hell, I have my own issues. Riding with me for 4.5 hours can be challenging. I have a WE DON'T STOP TO PEE rule for trips under 5 hours! Here is where I can insert that as you mature you do follow your gut more and you think things through. I listened to the voice whispering to me, "Everyone gets put into your life for a reason." So I said yes to the road trip. Yes, to talking to someone who I was not sure we had anything in common to talk about. We had never been to lunch together or at a party. Actually I had never spoken more than three sentences to this person my entire life.
We met at her house. Stuffed the car and took off. Fifteen minutes into the trip and we were in great conversation. By the time we hit the outskirts of Chicago we turned into a comedy skit. She was unfamiliar with the suburban area we were looking for and needed help from her passenger. But I was watching an important hockey game on a live feed that my son was playing in Pittsburgh against Indiana. So I had Siri talking to me on her phone in one hand. My iPad with the hockey game was on my lap, and my i-phone in my other hand was getting texts from mothers following us. Unfortunately they were pissed that we were switching lanes last minute, because Siri wasn't recognizing the tolls. We were laughing our asses off and practically crying. I'm sure she was thinking, " I'm riding with this chick that has totally left me hanging." The ride home was yet another experience of being under pressure in unexpected circumstances with someone new. We got caught in a horrific storm where we had some scary moments. I'm a control freak and she was driving… Breathe, that's it… big breaths Matuschka. It took us 6.5 hours to get home on pitch black roads with pelting rain and severe winds. The caravan had been dismantled so we were on our own. We prayed, kept each other focused and stayed light hearted as our girls slept in the back. I took a chance and stepped out of my comfort zone of road trip rules and rituals. (Damn if we didn't stop 2 hours into the drive, because of another car not ours. grrr) Road Trips
to Chicago; which there are many, will now trigger big smiles. There are street names and exits on Interstate 55 I will never forget because of my road trip with Theresa Callahan. It's not easy at midlife to step out of the box or stretch our comfort zone. But ohhh the blessings you can get by doing so are worth it! My Blessing was a road trip to remember and the beginning of a great friendship. Keep looking forward so you don't miss what God puts in front of ya!Matuschka's Midlife... Telling it like it is...
by Matuschka Lindo
Memory and Focus... These words are trick questions for mid-lifers. Is it our imagination or can we not multitask as much? Personally my mind has been playing tricks on me for about five years now. I really should buy some shares in Post-it Notes! Those colorful pieces of paper are my navigation system for the day. It seems that my mental file cabinet is on recall overload! I ask myself am I going crazy? Do I need to slow down? There is always that fear of Alzheimer's. Here are my top three memory scares.
1. I am driving home. A destination I can get to a variety of ways. I pass my exit and keep driving; until I am looking around thinking, where the hell am I and where was I going? Wasn't I on my way home? This is my all time freak out experience! It doesn't happen often, but even once a year is one time too many. I did read once that two Northwest Airline pilots missed the twin cities by 150 miles. Made me feel better... Wonder if they were female pilots in their mid 40's?
2. This one is soooo embarrassing. I am talking to someone, maybe my child's teacher during parent/teacher conferences and I am totally engaged in the conversation… Five minutes go by and I'm thinking whoops, I have no idea what you are saying since I just came back mentally? How do I drop out of a conversation so unintentionally and unwillingly? Where do our minds go? Is this normal?
3. I know I'm not alone! I predict the majority of you can feel my pain on this final brain fart. You are at home, you walk from one room to the next… then it happens! Yep! Hate that, don't you? The crazy question? What did I come in this room for.... Seconds ago we knew where we were going and why. We walked into that room with purpose and determination and poof just like that it's gone! I decided to go to therapist Ann Sullivan to get some answers about our midlife psyche.
So, there is some good news. This forgetfulness may not be forever! Along with Ann's advice on how life will slow down eventually for many of us, researchers now suggest that the middle aged mind preserves many of its youthful skills and even develops some new strengths! While memorization skills
and perceptual speed both start to decline in young adulthood, studies now show that verbal abilities, spatial reasoning, simple math abilities and abstract reasoning skills all improve in middle age. Woohoo we're still in the game! Speaking of games there are so many brain games to help keep it all working efficiently up in your noggin. Believe it or not there is a website called Lumosity
that basically provides a personal trainer for your brain. I don't know if I'm ready to work that hard to keep my brain up to par. I'm on beginner memory sliding level so a nice game of poker with a glass off goose on the rocks is a little more my speed. But hey I wanted to provide choices to you wiser older over achievers! Many of you out there are probably wondering if that damn game Candy Crush counts as a memory builder? Well, I think it's cockamamie but some say if you do the speed play version its great for the brain. Hmmmm as I said, "Deal and pass me my Vodka!" That's one saying I'll never forget!
By the way this mental mush includes men. I think it's selective memory that they have when it comes to their Mother-in-law's birthday, that dance recital and the non action movie date night. Of course a recent study says their excuses for forgetting may be legit
, regardless of their age. Meaning younger men forget as much as older men. Figures!Keep looking forward so you don't miss what God puts in front of ya!Matuschka's Midlife... Telling it like it is...
by Matuschka Lindo
Now there are Reunions and there are Reunions and I am not a fan of the latter. The gradual advancement of father time throws these events into our lives like confetti. It's a gathering of people you have not seen in a long time which means it's a game of chance on what the outcome will be. Let's talk about palatable reunions or shall I say the ones I prefer. Watching the soldier come back to be reunited with his family. The reunions I see on my good friends show APB with Troy Dunn on TNT. You can listen to an interview I did with him about the show. CLICK HERE
(Download the Troy Alert App Now!
) These reunions are heart felt and great. It's the Family Reunions and the Class Reunions that give me a little bit of pause… NO a lot of dread actually.
Let's talk Family Reunion- The family is a complicated thing filled with massive dysfunction no matter who you are or where you come from. I understand that family is a bond and that tracing your roots
, not forgetting where you came from, and keeping traditions and background is important. But I don't know if that correlates with go spend time with people you haven't seen in 5 to 15 years and have NOTHING in common with except your last name. I am sure the majority of people disagree with me. I love to see family just not extended extended-can't remember your name family. At my age my brain holds less and less, so to be introduced to Great Aunt Josie who's brothers son I use to ride big wheels with in Panama at age five. Who now has four daughters in Miami, but is raising the kids alone because of a great job his wife Amanda got in Puerto Rico etc. etc. etc.…. do you see where I'm going with this? NOWHERE! I don't want to know all this drama, what does it matter? I know I sound mean. I am more of a lets focus on immediate family with maybe one extension of first cousins then call it quits. Of course, if there is an emergency with any relative, I'll verify who the hell you are then see what I can do. Being Hispanic that still means over 100 people in my definition of close family… Aye Dios Mio! Let's stay in touch with Christmas Cards and call it a day okay?
The Class Reunion- There are specific reasons (I believe) to go to a class reunion. I am closing in for my 30th on high school and I think 25th for college, but not sure. I loved high school and college and all my friends of which I was blessed to have many like Troy. Yes, a class reunion is fun when you want to step back in time and tell old stories again and again and again. So there's that group that lives in the past. There's the group that maybe were not so popular that are now coming back to prove that they made it. There is also the curiosity of us ALL to see who is fat, who is skinny, who has no hair and who aged badly and who still looks hot. The remembering of the ones we lost who left way too early. Let's not forget the possible love-connections. Some may be attending to hitch up with a long lost love for round two if they heard rumors of a possible divorce. I'm not judging, all I'm saying is it's all a little creepy when you think about it. There's probably a certain time in midlife that everyone wants to attend a reunion of some kind to fill something inside of us. Nothing wrong with that. It just gives me reason to pause and ask myself, "Why exactly am I going to this again?" I will say my college 20th reunion was a total blast. Love my Tau Theta Chi Omega Sisters. What do you love or hate about reunions?Keep looking forward so you don't miss what God puts in front of ya!Matuschka's Midlife... Telling it like it is...
Both Pictures: William Woods 20th College Reunion with my Chi Omega Sisters- Hoot Hoot!
by Matuschka Lindo
There are certain aisles in a drug store that I just really don't want to walk down. The aisles that mean you have an age related problem. Aisles where people look at you and think yep, "She's hit Prime Pelvic Peeing Problem Stage." When do you confess to yourself that yes, my name is Matuschka and I have a bladder problem! Of course, just because you have a bladder problem does not mean its time for the Dreaded Depends
. I refuse to wear them before purchasing a walker. I can hold "it" pretty long all day and I drink plenty of water. So things are still working pretty good for me down there. Now I have friends, (don't worry I won't name you) that I can be with at a two hour luncheon. I kid you not, they will go to the bathroom two or three times in that short span. I'm like jeez, what is your problem? That being said, I have no room to talk. I am the girlfriend that is laughing so hard when someone tells a joke, that I can barely make it to the bathroom without a few squirts. To be 40 something and wetting your pants in public is not pretty. And while Kegel Exercises
can help many. It's of no use to those of us who gotta go go go just because we laughed, coughed, or sneezed.
Research out there states that there is a difference between Overactive Bladders
and what I have, by not being able to hold it when I laugh or do jumping jacks. All the more reason to cut back on my work outs. At least that's my excuse and I'm sticking to it! Seriously, I can't hide depends under work out tights so I just power walk or do weights now. When I was training for a half marathon I used to cop a squat every few miles. Just not worth it, I would think to myself… What a hot mess. I am going potty in public all over the streets of St. Louis, because I can no longer hold my urine at midlife grrrrr. I just can't risk being caught with my pants down in a bush at my age. Don't think it was just me. Half the girls that ran with me carried toilet paper up their sleeve or in their shorts, at least all the ones over 40. If you love the sport, you gotta do what you gotta do. Note to self - Don't drink coffee before a run, you may have to do more than number one. Trust me I've seen it happen!
I have Stress Incontinence, no surprise there… more stress! Actually, it's not related to psychological stress, ha that's another blog! It's basically unintentional loss off urine do to some physical activity like laughing my arse off. I feel bad for the person who may have the overactive bladder also, Ruh Roh
. It is possible to have both and more likely as you get older. You have to step back and look at what you eat, what you drink, and the medicines you are taking, making the dilemma a Catch-22. It always comes back to the same factors for all these aging ailments, what you put into your body
. I feel that we will all be eating Fiber One, with dry unseasoned chicken breast and peas for dinner every night by the time we are 80. Lord help us! So next time you are in a public restroom and the person next to you has a never ending stream. They are the lucky ones, they can still hold all that liquid.Keep looking forward so you don't miss what God puts in front of ya!Matuschka's Midlife... Telling it like it is...